I remember being a young girl—about ten or so—and going on vacation with my family to the Bahamas. While looking in a tourist shop there, I saw a shot glass decorated with an image of the "perfect woman." (If you google "the perfect woman shot glass" you will probably find it. However, I did not include it here as it has nudity.)
Legs. Breasts. Butt. Vagina. Nothing else.
I remember the visceral disgust I felt looking at that. How I turned the shot glass so its image faced the back of the shelf. How revolted I was.
Looking back, that was probably a watershed in my (slightly misguided) path toward feminism that I no longer support. After all, my young mind thought, how could they allow these shot glasses to be on display? In an area of town where there were young children and fanilies able to see them?
And why was the perfect woman so incomplete? Didn't she have a stonach? Where was the rest of her torso? Didn't she need to eat, breathe, digest food? (For some reason, ten-year-old-me didn't think that the perfect woman would also need a head. Of course, the perfect woman wouldn't need a head. The misogynistic men of my imagination who would buy these shot glasses probably never wanted to hear a woman speak, in the same way that men liked dogs for their inability to talk back).
When I look back on this experience today, I have to ask... Why was the perfect woman nothing more than a sex object, reduced down to her most "attractive" parts?
I'm grateful that somehow I made it through my adolescence without ever stumbling upon internet pornography. But images of women like the ones emblazoned on those shot glasses are as much a part of our sexualized culture as pornography is. Inescapable. Ubiquitous. Completely separate from a healthy view of the sexes and sex itself.
These shot glasses, an increasingly pornified culture, and sex dolls... They are symptoms of a culture that simultaneously upholds several conflicting ideas. One: women should be treated with dignity, respect, and are worth more than their bodies. Two: Women are and always will be sex objects and should capitalize on their objectification with songs like WAP and porn sites like OnlyFans.
The first comes from the West's Christian past, which asserts that all human beings (women included) have equal worth and dignity as they are made in the image of Christ. The second is an aftermath of the Sexual Revolution: Sex should be free, detached from love, marriage, obligation, consequences, or even children. The feminist movement cannot hold these ideas at the same time. Either women are people or sex toys for men.
And the main problem with the Sexual Revolution's detached view of sex is that sex is anything but casual. Treating it as such leads to condoms and contraceptives, filling the need for safe sex—but safe from what? Safe from STDs, unplanned pregnancies, but hardly safe from emotions and romantic attachments.
Free love is not free. It's carefully propped up and paid for by prophylactics, birth control (with numerous side effects), and lies about women's liberation and empowerment. Carnal pleasure, without the need to commit to a partner for life, or worry about responsibility? It is, of course, too good to be true.
When a man can have sex with a woman outside of marriage, without fear that her father will force him into a shotgun marriage or that a baby will "trap" him into matrimony, he has no reason to treat her well or be discerning. She is not the potential mother of his child or a potential spouse. She is nothing more than a good time and, to be frank, a glorified masturbatory sleeve, to him.
Women and men bond in different ways. A woman feels emotional attachment from sex, and thinks that sex will similarly make a man love her. Men can, generally, sleep with any woman without falling in love. Thus, the consequences of the Sexual Revolution bear far more harshly on the former sex than the latter.
The Sexual Revolution has changed men's view of women from potential wives and mothers to potential sex partners. Why else would The Perfect Woman be nothing more than a grotesque amalgamation of sexually attractive body parts? Why have marriage and birth rates plummeted in the West? Why are college campuses supposedly a hotbed of rape when what they are is a hotbed of hookup culture, which leaves women feeling used whether they consented or not? Why is there a veritable epidemic pickup artists telling men how to get laid?
Why else would sex dolls exist? If you can reduce a woman's value down to nothing more than her body, then why want anything more than a body? After all, a sex doll is the ultimate expression of this warped female submission to male sexual needs. A woman who is an object to fulfill a man's needs and bring him pleasure need not have an opinion or a brain or even be a woman at all.
To be crass, she only needs to be a hole. A vessel. A shot glass.
And that's what the Sexual Revolution has reduced women to: the same thing they were fighting not to be seen as.
This post was originally published on my Wattpad book, HONESTLY, July 2021.